hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
