oh god the rape fog is back!
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Come on in and take your pants off
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