I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
