I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize