i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
