i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
