Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
