Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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