what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
