He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
