We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
