i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
