we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize