all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
