I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
