the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
