ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
