The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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