i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
