you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I know her cup size but not her name....
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize