"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just cropdusted the office
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
