I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize