Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
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