"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
