They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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