Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Randomize
