Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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