And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
