Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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