The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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