i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
