i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
