all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
