Already got asked if we're dating
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
kristin has been a bad kristin
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
