Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
