I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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