the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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