I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Randomize
