It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
