Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
