You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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