Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
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