My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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