It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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