at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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