Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize