Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
