turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
