You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
