im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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