If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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