You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
